The Chair Train

The children found a new form of fun and silliness by making a train out of our kitchen chairs last week. Baby, sitting on the now rarely used booster seat, is driving the front engine. Of course, we had to leave the train in place until daddy came home from work to admire the children's creativity. Thank goodness they came up with this later in the afternoon because it's a pretty small area to be both a dining room and passageway to the back deck.

I know we still have a month of summer vacation since school doesn't start until the first week of September here, but it feels like summer is winding down. I have to start thinking about getting the vaccination records in order for Anna's preschool, getting fall school clothes, etc. Also, everything that has gone dormant in the summer awakens in the fall, so I also have on my short list to look into joining this choral group (for myself) and possibly church choir (for myself, though I'm not sure I'll be able to handle two singing groups a week). We never got around to getting Anna into a four-week summer ballet class, but I do hope to enroll her in a program for the fall, so I need to explore that. Also, I still can get the children into a little 2-week tennis class, but now I'm not so sure with these extreme temperatures (we hit 106 on three consecutive days recently...it's supposed to "cool down" into the 90s over the next few days). Perhaps I should save tennis for an early-summer June thing next year before it gets too hot. We're also planning a big garage sale in mid August. I can't even get my car into the garage for all the stuff we have to get rid of. And if we can't make money off it, it's getting given or thrown away.

Although I looked into several daycares for Alexander to be in while Anna is in preschool three hours a day on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, I decided that I'd rather keep him home with me. Mikel really pushed me to explore the options early on when I was feeling so tired and sometimes cranky! at the end of the day. It really took my body a good few months to get used to parenting, what with all the bending and squatting and kneeling and lifting and such -- not to mention the emotional drain that I was feeling more of in those early days. What did I expect -- we went from zero to two toddlers. Anyway, after making endless calls to daycares and visiting a few, I really felt strongly about keeping Alexander with me. .... Plus he's talking so much now that we are going to have tons of fun together. He's really a happy boy and very loveable. I have noticed he's gotten himself into a few more timeouts than usual the past couple days, though, I think mainly due to his boyishness and inquisitiveness and who knows what else. He's not really pushing the envelope and testing me (yet), like Anna has done before (though not as much anymore), so it's easy to sometimes really laugh about whatever it is that he's done. It's mostly just silliness. But I have to watch myself and not let him think that "It's OK. I can keep doing that because she thinks it's funny." Anyway, I digress. Regarding the daycare, I also hate to spend the money just so I can indulge in a few hours that I don't feel I absolutely have to have each day. With two children, a new house and me not working anymore, of course we're on a tighter budget than ever. My thought is: I could spend that money on something else like clothes or whatever other non-essentials I might need or want (though I know I really won't be spending that on myself instead each month).

Speaking of which, I was going through some photos taken in early June when the children and I joined several other moms at a local park. This was when I was going through that month or so of being a slacker blogger and never got these pics posted. Now, of course, they just feel too old. One of the moms was holding her newborn baby and another was pregnant. Both already had toddlers who were out playing with Anna and Alex. When I saw the photo I felt almost like two people. Wow. I'm a stay-at-home mommy leisurely going to the park with other moms. At mid morning. In the middle of the week. There was a time in my life when I was a very serious career girl, especially early in my career, and of course never imagined myself in such a position. Not that I didn't want it, but I also didn't necessarily dream of it (maybe because there were no prospects of a mate ... one thing leads to another, after all) and probably felt more like it just wasn't to be in my set of cards, so to speak. Of course, all of our lives change, don't they, as time goes on. I love this new role and my life and can't imagine doing anything differently right now. Also, I like being an older mom and feel much appreciative of my past experiences that have helped shaped me. I feel kind of empowered by it all. I'm sure I'll go back to work someday, but I'm not sure where or in what capacity (thanks to Mikel, ha! I can't go to work for him.) Frankly, I don't miss it at all — though I do keep up with the industry news pretty religiously. This might sound shocking for some of you old-timers (if you're out there you know who you are), but in the winter, spring and summer of 2006 I worked part-time for Polo clothes (as well as continuing to freelance write) while back in New York and I really enjoyed it! Maybe it was because I knew deep down that I didn't need it to survive and could walk away if I wanted to ... so that pressure wasn't there. The more I think about it, I almost feel like I do sort of miss something about that. Well, perhaps it was the 40 percent discount I enjoyed. Or maybe it was because it was all fairly recent. I was working there that day a year ago in August when our adoption agency called me to say we had our referrals! I rushed home and poured through all the details and photos that had been sent to my e-mail account. What an exciting time filled with so much expectancy!

Boy, I really digress now. Where did all that come from? They are just some random thoughts about being a mommy!